Vicky Goes On (Again)

Tag: doomscroll

  • I can’t get no sleep

    For the last 2 mornings I have woken up at 04:30*. In the morning.
    Prior to this, I had been waking up at 05:30. In the morning. THE MORNING. I know it’s Summer but where will this end? Next week 03:30? Then just not sleeping at all!? I AM EXHAUSTED.

    And yes, I know, the heat, I need blackout blinds, I need sleeping pills. Go to bed earlier, later, wear an eye mask, glue my eyes closed. I know. I don’t even really have a lie-in on the weekends, you know. I think I’ve become deranged.

    Did you know that a lack of sleep can actually, literally kill you? Well, if you didn’t know now you know. Did you also know that a lack of sleep can make you fall asleep in a busy office? Ask me how I know… (this is a made up story for humour and entertainment purposes. I swear.)

    So. What do I do? ummmm…


    Sleep hygiene tips:

    • Ensure you go to bed at the same time every night
    • Don’t doomscroll on your phone in bed (shut UP)
    • Take at least 30 minutes to wind down before bed time -_-
    • Block out the windows with black paint
    • Take at least 4 sleeping pills every night
    • Drink some whisky or whiskey
    • some of these might not be all that helpful
    • I’m losing my marbles
    • Take a siesta during the day. This is a human right and I have Spanish genes so surely I am being discriminated against if I am denied this

    Anyway, good luck out there. I love you. I’m tired.

    *I use the 24 hour clock to avoid mistakes on alarms which I clearly no longer need.

  • TikTok BrainRot

    TikTok BrainRot

    My name is Vicky and I am an addict.

    I am addicted to scrolling on TikTok and I know that is lame, and stupid but here we are.

    At least I’m honest. I tell people, “oh, no, I don’t have a TV in my bedroom. I just scroll on TikTok in bed for 75 hours a night.” And whilst I vacuum my flat. And whilst I do the washing up. And cook. And on the toilet. Oh and when I’m on the Overground. And when I’m brushing my teeth.
    I have this thing where my phone tells me a weekly report of what I’ve been up to on my phone and let me tell you, PHONE, that is none of my business (most used app is TikTok, second most used app is Matchington Mansion – a whole other story which I may or may not go into at a later date) but what am I supposed to do with that information? Do you use that information to change your phone habits? I should get a dumbphone. Smartphones are the worst thing that have happened to me. I google every random question that floats into my head. Is that really helpful? OK, it means I will never again have to spend several years trying to remember what the theme tune to Twin Peaks sounds like (thanks YouTube) but am I any happier? Are any of us?
    I have heard, as I am sure many of you have, that there is a new trend of “rawdogging” which is not the original meaning of that term, where people are just being. Just existing. And, like, I am happy for y’all but I am not built for that.
    When I was at school I had a backpack filled with novels, and notebooks, a CD walkman, a tape walkman, tapes, CDs, playing cards. I have clearly always needed to be distracted. Maybe I need medication.
    OK, so if I get rid of my smartphone we all know I am just going to go back to carrying all my stuff around again like that trash goblin in Labyrinth and I don’t have the back of a young woman any longer. Maybe I should put a limit on the TikTok app?

    The Junk Lady
    (me when I finally get rid of my Smartphone)

    Is that any way to live? I bought a Kindle which I carry around (I am filled with good intentions) but it has been 3 weeks and I have still not finished reading this book that I am trying to read. But maybe that’s the author’s fault? Ever think of that?
    I don’t know what to do. If you have any suggestions I am open and willing to consider them.
    Kthanksbye.